Cocoon Diaries: Entry #4 – Outsourcing Opinions: Why Everyone’s Approval is Overrated

The Court of Public Opinion..(have faced this!)

I lived once ruled by many minds, not mine,
Their nods, their frowns, their judgments sly and cold.
Approval dangled like some grand design,
A prize that kept my foolish heart on hold.

But time, that cheeky teacher, sat me down:
“Why crowd your soul with voices not your own?”
Their ‘likes’ don’t feed my peace, nor lift my crown,
Their ‘no’s’ can’t shake what seeds my heart has sown.

Now, lighter steps I take, my rule restored,
No need for their applause or discontent.
I sign my days with joy I can afford,
Their verdicts filed straight under: “Quite Irrelevant.”

Thus blooms my world — one nod, my own, will do.
A one-woman jury — calm, firm, and true.

Once upon a time (okay, not that long ago actually), I was that person — the walking suggestion box.

Should I take up that project?
Let me ask.
Should I wear that outfit?
Hold on, polling five friends.
Should I cancel that plan?
Well, I don’t want to upset anyone, so let me check who might feel bad.

Before I knew it, my entire existence resembled one giant, unpaid reality show called “Whose opinion Is It Anyway?”

The Great Awakening (Also Known As Common Sense Finally Kicked In)

Here’s what I finally realised:
Most people giving opinions have three things in common:

1️⃣ They are not living my life.
2️⃣ They are not paying my bills.
3️⃣ They will sleep very well regardless of whether I succeed, fail, cry, or binge-watch Netflix in pajamas.

And yet, I was outsourcing my sanity to them like it was a home delivery app. (Can use this simile now, we had no apps back then!!)

Opinion Inflation — The Epidemic

You see, we live in the era of “Instant Expertise.”

• Everyone’s a parenting guru.
• Everyone’s a career coach.
• Everyone’s a fashion critic.
• Everyone’s a relationship counselor (though their own marriages look like badly written soap operas).

God forbid you try something different — suddenly, unsolicited advice pours in like those endless WhatsApp forwards nobody reads but everyone forwards anyway. (Now, but back then it was advice the minute they heard you speak…casual and no depth at all.)

My New Policy: Selective Hearing + Internal Sanity Check

So now since some time (Read: 2 decades or more), I operate on what I call my Sanity-Based Approval System:

• Is it legal? ✅
• Is it ethical? ✅
• Is it peaceful? ✅
• Does it make me happy? ✅

If all boxes are checked, congratulations — APPROVED.

No committees.
No panels.
No extended family reviews.

Freedom: Highly Recommended

The truth is, when you stop outsourcing your happiness to other people’s approval ratings:

• You breathe better.
• You sleep better.
• Your coffee even tastes better (scientifically unproven, but I stand by it).

And those same people who had loud opinions?
They move on.
They find someone else’s life to micromanage.

My Beagle’s Approach To Life (Highly Effective Model)

If ever in doubt, I follow my beagle’s wisdom:

• Hungry? Eat.
• Sleepy? Nap.
• Sad? Snuggle.
• Happy? Zoomies around the house.
• Do you need everyone’s opinion?
  🐶 Look blankly. Blink twice. Wag tail. Ignore completely.

My Cocoon #4 musings:

At the end of the day, this is my life’s little slogan now:

“Feedback is welcome.
Unsolicited opinions will be processed in the order they arrived.
And most may be gracefully… deleted.”

Peace, my friend, is precious real estate — and I no longer rent it out cheaply.

#CocoonDiaries

#Entry4

#OpinionsNotRequired

#SelectiveSanity

#DramaFreeZone

#BeaglePhilosophy

#HappinessIsMyBusiness